It has been a chaotic week and a half. My parents came out Memorial Day, Hubs took his ATV out, other family and friends came and visited, Bear turned one and Saturday we had his big blow out birthday party!
It was a fantastic day. Beautiful weather (I have no pictures boo!!!) and a great turnout. The kids played games, ran through the sprinkler and Bear was generously given clothes and toys.
What a year it's been.
Followed by the most amazing day of my life today. We visited the geneticist up at the Children's Hospital. She has pretty much told us that this is definitely a "conception" issue (meaning it's genetic). All those moments of blame. The what-if's that I did something wrong. The could-I-have's. All over. This is an issue that occurred without any one's fault. This is exactly how he is intended to be.
I am amazingly happy. I know it probably seems weird. I had "gotten over" the feeling that I had caused this for the most part. But it my darkest times I would still cry over the fact that I could have done something wrong while pregnant and damaged my child. As mother's we always feel guilty for our child's suffering. It does not mean I am excited that my child will have a more difficult life than a typical one, or that my child will be different. I am relieved of the burden of guilt that I caused this.
In more Bear news, He showed up that Baby Book milestone (how many teeth I had for my first birthday) by getting his first tooth Tuesday night!!! Bear turned One on Wednesday. The top two are coming in at the same time now too. We had a teeth explosion.
We relaxed at the Beach on Sunday and had some lovely swimming. Wednesday Bear and I will be flying to visit family all by ourselves. What an exciting time!
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